Hello Frivsters,
As some of you know the Friv will be updated sporadically over the next few months, as my partner Kate and I are going traveling through Thailand & India. The Friv will be back at full steam in a few months. Check out this week's bumper Friv to keep you occupied.
Until next time, slan.
Eric
distractions
Thirsty Monkey
Raving
Japanese Board Game (thx Rob B)
games
Jerry (Maguire) O'Connell Speaks
pulp
The Definition of Stupidity (Swearing)
if you've got time...
Hugh Cort for President campaign ad
Haliburton
design
Bikini Zero Tech news
Dublin Stories (thx John F, Caroline)
On a No 13 bus in Ranelagh a harassed looking man was relating a story to a friend.
"On Friday night last I came home from work and the Missus asked me to have a word with the 8 year old about his bad language. Now I was knackered from the week's work and told her I would talk to him in the morning. Next morning I came into the kitchen and there were my 2 sons the 8 year old and his 5 year old brother. I asked the 8 year old what he would like for brekkie and he put his 2 hands behind his head, threw the feet up on the table and said he would like a f**king egg.
At this stage said the harassed parent I lost the head completely and hit him a few clips on the legs, then still shaking I turned to the 5 year old and asked him what he would like for brekkie. The 5 year old clearly shaken by the previous events said in a tremulous voice.........
I'm not having a f**king egg anyway.
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My brother was in Mulligan's pub on Poolbeg street having a pint at the bar when a yank came up and said to the barman
"Excuse me sir, where is your bathroom?"
So the barman gave him directions and off went the yank. A few minutes later the yank returns and says to the barman
"Excuse me sir, there's no lock on the door".
The barman replied without looking up from the pint of Guinness he was pulling
"As long as I've been here, no-one ever tried to rob a shite."
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Sitting in the Hogan stand a few years back at a Kerry versus Dublin football match there was these two men, one sitting in front of me and another sitting behind me. One was a Kerryman the other a Dubliner. The match was tight and a fairly heated affair and the two boys were fairly vocal to say the least. Each doing their best to wind up the other. Anyway a Kerry player sent high lobbing ball down the field, a Dublin player was all alone underneath it, hands out stretched it looked like a wasted ball by the Kerry player.
Laughing the Dublin Fan shouts
"Nice f**king pass ya f**king sheep shagger".
As the ball descended on-top of the Dublin player it fell through his hands, bounced of his knee and flew into the stand. In turn the Kerry supporter stood up in hysterics and blasted out
"IF TWAS A BAG OF HEROIN YOU'D CATCH IT WUDNT EW YU JACKEEN BASTARD"
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I was in the queue in a post office and there was an aul wan ahead of me, she says to the post mistress
"Give us the stamps so I can post this parcel"
The post mistress weighted the parcel and gave the aul wan the parcel and the stamps. The aul wan looked at the post mistress and said
"Will I stick em on meself?"
The post mistress says, without any hesitation
"No love, stick them on the parcel"
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A bus stops with its front wheels slightly inside a yellow box at a junction. A guy with a flash girlfriend and a flash convertible car pulls up beside the bus.
The flash guys shouts out his window at the bus driver:
"YELLOW BOX, YELLOW BOX".
The bus driver opens his window and says back to him:
"You'd better get her to the clinic"
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Me and my mates got a smart arse Dublin taxi driver into town, and on the journey me and the lads are talking about the women we are gonna chat up when outta nowhere the taxi driver pipes up with this little gem.
"u boys'll be doin no scoring tonight! yis are all uglier than Eamon Dunphy's foreskin!!!!"
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